God, it’s me again. Marie.
Still remember me?
Long time no see….
Let me tell You about something (though I know exactly that You have known about literally EVERYTHING, let me recite this for my own sake).
I have a new friend. A boy. Super smart, energetic, fun to talk with, everything….
I was so happy to have him as my friend. We have lots in common. I thought we had an instant chemistry between us.
My soul had been so lonely for a long time. So when I met him, thinking that I could live happily ever after, I got a little over excited, over enthusiastic.
I asked too many questions, I told too many stories. And I freaked him out. I scared him.
Oh God, how could I be so stupid? It just downed on me that what I wished was just too good to be true. It was just a utopia for me. Having a perfect world, where people understand me (or in this case, one person is enough), is something impossible.
God, I think he is afraid of me because he thinks I am after something. That I want something more. More than a pure friendship.
No, God, no. It’s just a coincidence that he is a boy and I am a girl. I am just happy to talk to him, pouring out what I have in mind, what I can’t tell other people because maybe they won’t get what I mean. The jokes I like, the thoughts.
God, can You please tell him not to be afraid of me?
I promise I won’t freak him any further.
I promise I will be a normal friend, very normal.
I won’t ask questions he doesn’t like.
I won’t tell him stories he doesn’t want to hear.
I promise.
Can You tell him that, God?
Thank you.
ME AND MY THOUGHTS 